Asking the internet

[sami]

So, here's the thing.

I know from reading posts like this that certain things my hair does are quite common with some types of hair more common in people of non-European/non-Asian descent.

However, I think that on the scale of asking non-white people to Represent Their Race, going up to random black people with nice hair and saying, "Your hair is awesome! How do you do it?" might come across just ever-so-slightly wrong.

The trouble is, I don't actually know anyone with hair like mine, and I've only seen people talk about hair like mine in the context of dealing with "black" hair. Most of it's fine - it's thick, it's curly, I haven't had it cut or trimmed in at least three years so I have slight split ends I'll get around to having trimmed at some point, and I manage it by being sure to use conditioner and keeping it braided almost all the time to keep it the hell out of my face, and it doesn't bother me. (And I can surprise people on special occasions by busting out some serious curls.)

But the hair near my neck refuses to get long, so it won't go into the braid, and it sticks out in ways I find both irksome and kind of distracting. That hair is tangly, kinky, and fragile. It gets about three or four inches long and then it gets tangly and knotty (even self-knotting) and breaks a lot.

Anyone know what I should do to maintain it better?

Comments

[alias_sqbr]

*does an interest search* What about curlyhair?

My hair is all terribly frizzy, it's such a pain, the only time it's been under control was when the hairdresser straitened it and then recurled it for my wedding!

Do you object to Product? Unfortunately they all bring me out in a rash :(

[tevriel.livejournal.com]

I don't inherently object to using Product, so much as object to anything which is a) expensive b) time-consuming c) both.

[alias_sqbr]

I found leave in conditioners did some good, and they're pretty easy, and as expensive or cheap as you're willing to go :)

But looking through that comm there were various suggestions for cheaper/more natural solutions. My mum always favoured olive oil, but her hair is MEGA thick and coarse.

[tevriel.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think olive oil would just make mine icky. My hair is thick, but very fine. (Or so I've been told by hairdressers.) I'll check it out.

[ataxi.livejournal.com]

"... certain things my hair does are quite common with some types of hair more common in people of non-European/non-Asian descent.

However, I think that on the scale of asking non-white people to Represent Their Race, going up to random black people with nice hair and saying, "Your hair is awesome! How do you do it?" might come across just ever-so-slightly wrong.

I think this is perhaps drawing a rather long bow. If you knew a person of "non-Euro/non-Asian descent", I don't see why (so long as you kept discussion practical) asking them about what they did regarding hair maintenance would be politically questionable, so long as the generic boundaries of asking questions "like that" were dealt with as normal. Bit different to approaching "random people with nice hair" to make personal remarks and request advice, but that seems daft at the best of times.

By the way, clearly you what you need is peroxided dreadlocks.

[alias_sqbr]

clearly you what you need is peroxided dreadlocks.

Dyed green.

[tevriel.livejournal.com]

You are both dead to me.

[ataxi.livejournal.com]

Seriously, if maxfenig had your hair type she would've gone the dreads years ago. She tried once but her hair's fine and straight, so they didn't work.

Dreadlocks done right are both beautiful and sophisticated.

[tevriel.livejournal.com]

See, you might have avoided your untimely death had you not suggested my nominal dreadlocks be peroxided, but no, you brought in BLEACHED dreadlocks, which... no. If nothing else, I am reconciled to my dark hair and intend to enjoy it until I start going grey.

Sadly, you brought in peroxide. And so, your death to me was inevitable.

[ataxi.livejournal.com]

Don't you want to look like a cheap extra from The Matrix sequels? Disappointed!

[moogiemoo.livejournal.com]

Since the most restless and troublesome locks seem to be the ones at the back of your neck I would perhaps try to super condition them perhaps with warm olive oil prior to your next washing. That way the oil will be gone but hopefully will soften the tangles.

Barring that I would definitely go with blonde dreadlocks. : )

People are making interesting comments on this that might be helpful:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-U3w8y-1Xuw

[tevriel.livejournal.com]

That's a good thought, thank you. Oil *before* washing hadn't really occurred to me.

[trexphile.livejournal.com]

I've got the curly/frizzy/fuzzy hair, too. And out of all the different products I've tried, there is only one that absolutely does what it's supposed to do: Matrix "Smooth Me" gel. (http://www.matrixbeautiful.com/products/vavoom/smoothing_gel.aspx) Unlike every other gel I've tried, this one is not at all sticky or gummy, and it doesn't make your hair clump up. It takes much less of this than any other gel I've tried -- just a little in the palm of your hand fingercombed through.

It takes the fuzz out, and I can arrange my hair into the semblance of what I want it to do when dry -- if I do so immediately after applying the gel.

Then I let my hair airdry for two hours, if possible. I remove the last of the dampness with a blowdryer on low heat and low "blow," then, using a wide-toothed plastic pick, lift the hair a little at the roots to shape where needed.

I've discovered that I can use just about any shampoo or conditioner (barring the totally cheapy off-brands) and, as long as I use that Matrix gel, my hair will cooperate with me.

There's another Matrix gel I've tried, but it just doesn't do the job that the "Smooth Me" does. It's wondrous stuff.

It's a salon product and a little more expensive than something you'd find in a regular store, but I only buy maybe three tubes a year TOPS -- and I use this stuff every day.

[tevriel.livejournal.com]

Hee! TrexMNTNCE has returned! ♥ ♥ ♥ I should have known I could just ask you.

Thanks for the recommendation. I might give that one a try - if you only use three tubes a year, I imagine I definitely won't go through it that fast. (Because you know I love you, but you spend WAY more time on your hair than I could spend on mine without having an aneurysm.)

[lanterne_rouee]

there's a good book called curly girl by lorraine massey that covers caring for curly hair of different textures in natural ways.

personally, i like aubrey organics hair products. i use one of their conditioners and the styling gel every day; shampoo less often.

every so often for variety's sake, i'll set my hair while it's wet on huge plastic rollers (with the little papers) using protein gel... haha i just looked at it to get the brand name: lusti professional. lol anyway, i let it air dry and it pretty much straightens my hair out - just big loose curls, instead of my naturally spirally ways - without using heat at all.

the same thing sort of happens from wearing it pinned up the whole day (or a few days in a row) and then taking it down, though the lower half of hair that was in the bun doesn't reliably get as 'straight' as the part that lies close to the head. (i trust you know what i mean by that. lol) also, both of these methods involve using a hairbrush which the book i just recommended is totally against. ;)

getting it cut is tricky because most stylists don't keep their scissors sharp enough... it damages the hair while they are trimming/cutting it. theoretically, i trim my own now (have hair scissors, plus sharpener; good to go), but to be honest, i only do it once every few years. i was told by a stylist i should never do it myself because i can't see my whole head and whether i'm cutting it evenly or not, but i'm not fussed about having a stylish haircut. (or whether or not i have split ends, really. lol) i wear it up most of the time anyway.

also, someone told me recently about some japanese ionic hair straightening process that's supposed to be permanent (except for new growth) and isn't a harmful, chemical straightening technique. from what i gather it's pretty expensive but gaining in popularity because it eliminates the frizzy-with-humidity problem and people can style their hair in a few minutes 'forever' after. wouldn't be for me, but might be an option if you want to give up your curliness altogether.

maybe some of this will be helpful? if you don't go for any sort of permanent straightening, you do have to experiment a bit to find what suits your own hair best. good luck! :)

oh, and if you're not too shy, totally ask people whose hair you admire what they do or where they get it done. if you're complimentary and polite, i don't see why that would be offensive.