Moments of Permanence - on gender and words

About on gender and words

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From:[personal profile] xtina
Date: June 7th, 2017 01:59 pm (UTC)
I do use they/them for myself. There's no doom here; I keep meaning to reply but the world has sort of exploded at home. Didn't want you thinking I was upset or similar.
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From:[personal profile] sami
Date: June 7th, 2017 02:31 pm (UTC)
I appreciate your thoughtfulness.

I will also endeavour to remember you are a they/them person hereafter. I mean, it's not like I have reason to refer to you in the third person very often, but if nothing else, the principle is important.

It comes back to what's always my bottom line on all things gender, which is: it doesn't hurt me, or anyone else, and it costs me nothing, so misgendering people is just really unforgivably rude.

("Just take people's word for it" is also a really helpful rule for simplifying Gender Issues Stuff if you are someone who, fundamentally, does not actually understand this at all, because, seriously, I was assigned female at birth, I was a little girl, who became a woman, and I can't comprehend how I could be anything else, and because this shit reconciles REALLY EASILY when you're cis, I do not really understand on what basis you could assign a gender other than apparent physical configuration. Which, you see, therefore indicates, strongly and irrefutably, that I am ignorant and dumb as a bag of rocks on this subject and should simply accept the teachings of the informed.)
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